Getting to the end of 2020… thank goodness

Remember back when it was March? I still remember debating whether or not to cancel classes at my studio, Mermaids, here in Tamarindo, Costa Rica. I remember not really comprehending the magnitude of what was to happen, locally, let alone, globally. I also remember believing that if we all just stay home for three weeks in March we would be able to nip this virus in the bud.

This is when I start laughing or start crying, just thinking back at all that we didn’t know. And now, knowing all that we do, and we still can’t beat Covid-19. It’s so divisive. I guess I should have seen that coming. People inherently put themselves in groups and so it makes sense we don’t all see eye-to-eye on how to live during a global pandemic. The division of mask versus no mask, social distancing versus living life like normal. Back in the day, December felt forever away, as though all the Covid problems would be solved and we would definitely be able to visit our friends and families for the holidays, and yet, alas, it isn’t so.

All of the normal things that we do during the holidays: parties, flying home, seeing Santa, ice skating in NYC, baking cookies with my mom and dad. The list can go on but this blog isn’t about all the things we’re missing out on, or at least, it’s not supposed to be.

I’ve found, that when I begin to get down about all the ways things “should” have been, the list is endless and it definitely doesn’t ever make me feel better. So I go outside with my journal, put my toes in the sand and gaze into the ocean and write down everything I am grateful for and I begin to fill myself back up again. In the simplest way, where we look, is what we see.

We are all at a critical moment to either work to get back to where we were, or we work to create a brand new beginning. What do you see? Where are you looking? It’s like when my son is building a sandcastle and the tide comes and washes it away. He’ll get angry and cry and try (bless his heart) to use his plastic bucket to keep the tide at bay. But the tide keeps coming in and there isn’t anything he can do about it. But he can learn from it. Learn from the past and take the tide washing away his present to create a better future, er castle.

As much as we want to stomp our feet and wish the tide of 2020 away, that isn’t the reality. We’re in this, together. Some folks don’t seem to be learning as fast as others and continue to build their castles too close to the water’s edge and that has been frustrating. And so I come back to remembering the only constant is change. This will change. We will change. I will change. This gives me hope.

There’s a really fantastic video by Will Smith about Fault versus Responsibility. It is not your fault that you are alive during a global pandemic, and still, it is absolutely your responsibility to do your best to survive this pandemic and to help others survive along with you. We are all in this together. There will be an after Covid-19, I promise. Let’s all give big hugs when we get to the other side.

I would like to leave you with a poem by Alex Elle’s book, Neon Soul.


look at you.

still standing

about being

knocked down

and thrown out.

look at you.
still growing
after being
picked and plucked
and prodded out of your home.

look at you.

still dancing

and singing

after being

defeated and



look at you, love.

still here and hopeful

after it all.


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